Posted in Parenting

525,600 minutes – how do you measure a year in the life?

Listen???  Hear that?

 No?

 Yeah, me either. Isn’t is fabulous?

 I’m home alone for the first time in 12,963 minutes…but who’s counting?

And I may just have alone time for an hour or two, but the silence is deafening definitely glorious.

I am currently sharing my life, my house, my free time, my quiet time, noisy girlsmy empty nest, and my secret stash of organic chocolate and cashews with my daughter and her two babies.  Boo is 4 years old.  We’re still counting Latte’s age in months.

(I tried doing that too, but 619 months doesn’t help me sound younger.)  

Anyway, the girls are pure joy and giggles.  Life and light.  Beauty and spontaneity.  Wonderment and love.

And THEY. JUST. NEVER. STOP. TALKING.

Latte has a vocabulary of 35 words, most of which sound like “MINE!” and “BITE” and “AH AH AH!!” and unless you are reading her body language, it’s hard to decipher which is which.  Boo, the 4-year-old, serves as the younger one’s commentator.  She has a vocabulary of 3,000 words, but 1/3 of the time she relies on “actually” and “amazing” to make her point.

 “Emmy, Emmy, Emmy, Emmy, peeze, Emmy” says the toddler while poking my leg with a purple ink pen.  “Emmy I uh uh uh I peez half?”

 “Hey, um, M.E. (pronounced “Emmy”, my g-mother name), Charlotte actually wants to have your lotion. Can she have your lotion? The one that smells like coco oil?” says the commentator.

 Continuing from the toddler, “Emmy, Emmy, Emmy” as the leg poking turns to more of a leg slapping, “Emmy Emmy Emmy, I I I I uh I I I I uhhhhh… PEEEEEEEEEZE!”

 “M.E., Charlotte actually said please. She really wants your lotion.  It would be amaaazing if you would actually give her some of your lotion. I think she actually wants to try the coco one,” the narrator insists.

As I pick up the coconut-scented lotion to squeeze a dab onto her tiny pudgy little hand, the toddler begins to hyperventilate from excitement.  Bouncing up and down, flapping her arms like a wounded albatross trying to take flight she exclaims, “YA!  YA!  Emmy, YA!  YA!  Peez, ya!  Emmy, YA, Ta tu!”

Boo’s commentary continues: “M.E., Charlotte said ‘ta tu’, that means ‘thank you’. Isn’t that actually just so so sweeeeeet?  How did you know Charlotte actually wanted lotion?  Why do you think Charlotte wanted lotion?  I think she actually likes the coco oil smell.  I like the coco oil smell too. It smells amaaaazing. Do you think I could actually have some coco lotion too??!!”

This encounter lasted exactly 51 seconds.  Similar encounters occurred 257 times today alone.  483 if you count the ones they had with their mom.

In between the jabbering conversations they sing. And by “sing” I mean they sing ‘Annie’ songs.  Exclusively.

Thank you, Pandora.

Lyrics like, “The sunna come out tomorrow, hetcha bottom dollar then tomorrow” and “It’s a hard nuck life.” The toddler also knows every word to the entire Broadway soundtrack, but it sounds something like, “ToNOOO ToNOOOOO, AAAAHHHHHH  AHHHHHH….OH!  LEE!  DAY!  A!  WAY!!!”

It’s precious. And wonderful. And entertaining. I wouldn’t trade this time for anything. But I won’t lie – I was 8 seconds away from a core implosion when they pulled out of the driveway.

And the silence is, actually, amazing.

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I am happily ever writing...

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